... About Good Intentions

Turns out, Reader, I'm not what you would call a "highly motivated" individual.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying I'm lazy. Although I am. But that's not what I'm talking about here. What I'm talking about is... iuhno. I lost my train of thought. But I think it was something along the lines of... like... goals? Accomplishing them, or not accomplishing them, or something.

I mean, I want to do stuff. I really do. I just don't want to actually do anything about it. Basically, what I think I'm saying, is that all the things I want should just happen without me having to put forth any kind of effort.

Is that so unreasonable?

I think my real problem is time management. I always manage to convince myself that I have a lot more time to get stuff done than I actually do. I remember being at an age where I thought it was funny when adults said things like, "This year has gone by so fast," or "The years just keep passing by quicker and quicker." As a kid, I knew they were wrong. Time didn't go faster when you got older! Now, all of the sudden, I realize they were right. It wasn't very long ago when time still moved at the right speed, and yet it was forever ago. That probably has something to do with Einstein's Theory of Relativity, which basically says this: The kid version of me got in a spaceship while the adult version of me waited on Earth... and then Donald Duck showed up and did something about a pool table? Thank you, all my junior high teachers who relied on educational Disney videos!

Anywho, last January, instead of making New Year's Resolutions, I made "Things to Do Before I'm 25" Resolutions. Which is basically the exact same thing, but I thought it'd mean more to me if I personalized it. I mean, anybody can have New Year's Resolutions, but only 3,712,136 people in the U.S. are turning 25 this year. That makes me feel a bit more special. And I like being special, Reader.

But now here I am, less than six months away, and I'm discovering that even the magic birthday deadline hasn't motivated me. Which is not to say that I've done nothing toward my goals; I just haven't come as far as I should have. I have managed to complete at least one major one, so props to me on that. But the others... eh, not so much.

I know what you're thinking, Reader. I shouldn't set such rigid timelines for myself, especially on big life-goals. They'll happen when they happen, blah blah blah. That's just crazy talk, Reader. Question: If I don't set a deadline for myself, how will I know that I'm a failure? Huh? Answer me that. Answer: I won't. I won't know that I'm a failure. I won't know that I'm not accomplishing anything with my life. And then I'll just be wandering around all willy nilly thinking I'm awesome all the time.

No, Reader. That is not the way.

You can't fault me for trying, though. Sometimes I get really ambitious. I make mental charts and diagrams and lists, I plan out exactly how I'm going to get something accomplished. But then I usually fall asleep and forget all about it by morning. Or afternoon. Depends on when I fall asleep. Either way. But all that trying is just exhausting, Reader. It seems to get me nowhere. Like Homer said (in Odyssey, I believe? Or was it Iliad?), "Try is the first step to failure." Wise words to live by, Homer.

But the best thing about resolutions, Reader, is that we always get another shot! So, yeah, instead of having one year to finish my remaining goals before I hit the big dos-five, I'll instead have 131 days to finish them! And really, if you think about it, that's a lot of days. I'm feeling really motivated right now, Reader! I should work out a plan, put all these ideas down in a chart of some sort... maybe I'll make a cool little spreadsheet to track my progress! Yeah, that's the ticket! I'll even color code it.

Of course, it'll take a little time to get all these visual aides put together, and that just eats into the time spent actually working on my goals. I should really get cracking, then. Later today. Or maybe tomorrow. No need to stress about it. I still have plenty of time.